Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Randomize
