We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
