You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Randomize
