I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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