Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
