I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
