Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
