Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
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