found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Randomize
