upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
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