was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
