Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
