Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize