escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
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