The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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