Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
