It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I think my fart just growled at me.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Randomize
