Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize
