distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Randomize
