what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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