It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize
