Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
