Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize