so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
