my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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