I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
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