Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
