maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Randomize
