At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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