And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
