im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
