Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
