You're earring is so big in my mouth
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
