I CAN MOONWALK!
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
