What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
