i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
you never un-have a 4some
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize
