that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
