just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
