I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Randomize
