I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Randomize