Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
