After last night, I could never be a politician.
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
