Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Randomize
