Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize
