Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
