I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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