Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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