who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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