he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
