We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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